When will I ever compete?!

This blog post is going to be more like a diary entry, detailing some of the emotions and feelings I have been experiencing lately and barriers I need to overcome!

So I first became interested in Bodybuilding in March 2012 and for the first three months I was so dedicated with my diet and training. I started looking at competitions and pondered on the idea of entering Miami Pro in April this year. A goal which I truly did believe I could achieve if I worked hard. Since then countless Miami Pro’s have occurred, I’ve been to watch a few UKBFF shows, been glued to Twitter for updates on NABBA and BNBF shows and I have supported a lot of people who I follow on Twitter in their stage debuts.

I have even watched many people on Twitter fall in love with the idea of competing long after I did, and achieve their goals of stepping on the stage, with a lot of them even placing or winning! These people continue to inspire me everyday in knowing normal every day people can do this with a lot of hard work and effort.

Right now, I kind of feel embarrassed. I know everyone takes this journey at their own pace and reaches their destination at different times, but whilst I have been making slow gradual progress, when someone asks me “When are you going to compete?”, the answer is probably never if I carry on the way I am!

Friends, family, colleagues, people I speak to on Twitter are probably thinking, this girl said she goes to the gym and eats clean why does she always look the same! Some people at work have even commented saying they thought I was going to compete this year, am I going to do it next year?!

While this is a little embarrassing, the whole point of this blog post is to admit to the barriers I face so that I can overcome them. I am a big believer in visualization and also writing problems down so that you can face them head on.

The weeks where I make the most progress are the weeks I have a proper plan set out, I can prepare my food and know what to eat when and what to train on what day, This is a positive thing until I miss a meal or miss a training session ,it throws me off track and I spend the rest of the week demotivated. This is definitely something I need to overcome, as one bad day shouldn’t spiral into a week! CONSISTENCY IS KEY!

I think my biggest stumbling block is self doubt. At present, I do not have the money nor the time to invest in a personal trainer/coach. So I write my own diet Β and training plans based on the plans I have been given from coach’s before. I know that if I was consistent and stuck to these plans I would probably have greater success then I do now, but along the way I see girls on Twitter relying on their coach’s and at the end of the day these people really know what they are doing a lot better than I do, so I start to doubt what I am doing. I know this is silly because if I just carried on I would be making progress towards my final goals and I would be in a better position for when I am able to see a PT, which will hopefully be soon πŸ™‚

It is important to BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. In this sport, although a coach may be able to guide you, it is ultimately you who puts in the hard work and graft, the coach can motivate you but they cannot do the work for you.

HOWEVER, it is not all doom and gloom πŸ˜€ After watching the girls at the Midlands UKBFF ,seeing hundreds of gorgeous photos from Miami Pro and even the Olympia it has really inspired me still, I don’t look at these girls and think I could never do it, I truly believe one day my dream will come true, like theirs did too.

NEVER GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS!

Even though right now I am being realistic and honest about why I am not reaching my goals, I do know with hard work and consistency I can turn this around. I feel like the Queen of Start overs and people may laugh at me but as long as one time you start over and stick to the plan, you will get there eventually! Start overs do become boring though, so this time I need to stick to the plan!

I read a tweet a few weeks ago where someone said that you know what your real dreams and passions are when you never stop thinking about them! This is so totally true for me, i have bodybuilding on the brain 24/7!

I have been making significantly more progress lately, the main driving point is I have my fitness qualification exams on November 16th and then I am hoping to start applying for jobs in a gym. I am a big believer of practice what you preach, so I don’t want to go to these interviews looking fat and unfit or start trying to advise people on fitness if I don’t look the part myself! Body fat is gradually going down and once i’m happy with that I want to work on getting hench πŸ˜‰

Thankyou for all the fitfams support, sometimes I think you must all think I’m a crazy stalker just liking all your stage pics! There are some new girls I have been following on Twitter who are just starting their journey and making amazing progress, I am determined that in a years time I won’t be sat here writing the same post and with them all stepping on the stage without me!!!

Mwah xxxxxxxxxxxx

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